Due to the huge response from the last entry with this title I thought I would try to elaborate a little more. Before the last entry, I was worried that I might come across OCDish (obsessive compulsive disorder – like) and I think I succeeded in not doing so. On the other hand I think I missed part of what I was trying to explain. I would also like to say that I do not have all the answers, thankfully I can get valuable and very much appreciated insight from my friends.
I had this sensation (of pure emotion based decision making) recently in different cases and thought I would get a little more specific to illustrate.
My thought processes went like this: “It’s about time I finally got that Canon 17-35 2.8 wide angle lens, and its only $1500. I mean what am I waiting for? I’ve had my current 15-30 Sigma now for 4 years, and even though its great, that extra stop from 3.5 to 2.8 would be wonderful.”
I then proceed to imagine how wonderful life would be with my new Canon 17-35 2.8 lens and in a very subtle way form an emotional bond with the thought, as if my happiness depended on getting that lens. In fact, I really don’t even need that lens, yet for some reason, I “make-up” a reason to think it will make me happy. I know that if I were to get the lens, I would be giddy about it for a week and then that happiness would fade.
Another example: I did a body building contest a few years ago, it magnified these sensations in relationship to food. I believed that eating certain things had everything to do with my happiness. Again, if food is what usually makes you happy, something is off. Both of these examples show how we can be lead to make illogical decisions because we believe something can make us happy.
Another example would be how we relate to money. While money is certainly nice to have, I know it is wrong to form an emotional connection with money, to the degree it is “loved”.
I really feel that what I may be attempting to describe is the discipline of emotional self control, much of which has to do with “making due with what you have or doing without”, as well as what we place our desires and happiness on. Regardless of how much income we make, the tendency to want more, especially when we get a raise, seems to out pace our abilities to meet those wants. I believe this happens in every type of situation, money, food, relationships, etc. Excess promotes waste and error. Our emotional wants, have the ability to high jack our thoughts and lead us to incorrect thinking.
After the discussion we had after the last entry, I definitely agree that correct logical thinking often leads to correct emotional well being, but because emotions are so wide ranging, they cannot be trusted as a choice making scheme that will bring happiness. Emotions must be bridled and constantly kept in check.
Ask any woman who “loves” a man who doesn’t love them back if they are “happy”? Surprisingly, many will say they are, even when they are not.
Road rage is another extreme example; perfectly normal, rational people become murderers because they cannot keep their emotions in check.
While these are extreme illustrations, I believe that on a daily basis we confuse ourselves with what will bring us happiness. Thankfully, we can control these thoughts and feelings if we recognize them.
To answer Tracy’s last questions I will say this:
Tracy- I like to think of emotion as what drives the action after the thought has gone into it. A football player can be very emotional and also mistake prone. If the football player can channel his emotions into the framework of his assignment or training, he becomes unstoppable. If he were to run around yelling and screaming without direction, his teammates would think he was crazy. The thought is the direction and aim, the emotion fuels the execution. This is exactly how it is for me with photography. When they are both there…wow…its synergistic and amazing! One alone isn’t enough. Ask anyone who sees my reaction after a good shoot or photo. It’s one of the best natural highs. So to answer your question, its not so much about turning off your emotions as it is keeping them in check, usually after you have thought it out, and then applying the emotion to it. When I say this, I am talking about good emotions.
Bad emotions are basically like bricks. You are just carrying extra weight, find a way to unload these emotions or remove yourself from situations where you feel them and just move on.
I think the discussion of how faith plays a role in our thoughts and emotions will be the next entry on this topic. Obviously, its deep and beyond my understanding, but I will throw out what I think about it and would love to hear what you guys think as well.
Due to the huge response from the last entry with this title I thought I would try to elaborate a little more. Before the last entry, I was worried that I might come across OCDish (obsessive compulsive disorder – like) and I think I succeeded in not doing so. On the other hand I think I missed part of what I was trying to explain. I would also like to say that I do not have all the answers, thankfully I can get valuable and very much appreciated insight from my friends.
I had this sensation (of pure emotion based decision making) recently in different cases and thought I would get a little more specific to illustrate.
My thought processes went like this: “It’s about time I finally got that Canon 17-35 2.8 wide angle lens, and its only $1500. I mean what am I waiting for? I’ve had my current 15-30 Sigma now for 4 years, and even though its great, that extra stop from 3.5 to 2.8 would be wonderful.”
I then proceed to imagine how wonderful life would be with my new Canon 17-35 2.8 lens and in a very subtle way form an emotional bond with the thought, as if my happiness depended on getting that lens. In fact, I really don’t even need that lens, yet for some reason, I “make-up” a reason to think it will make me happy. I know that if I were to get the lens, I would be giddy about it for a week and then that happiness would fade.
Another example: I did a body building contest a few years ago, it magnified these sensations in relationship to food. I believed that eating certain things had everything to do with my happiness. Again, if food is what usually makes you happy, something is off. Both of these examples show how we can be lead to make illogical decisions because we believe something can make us happy.
Another example would be how we relate to money. While money is certainly nice to have, I know it is wrong to form an emotional connection with money, to the degree it is “loved”.
I really feel that what I may be attempting to describe is the discipline of emotional self control, much of which has to do with “making due with what you have or doing without”, as well as what we place our desires and happiness on. Regardless of how much income we make, the tendency to want more, especially when we get a raise, seems to out pace our abilities to meet those wants. I believe this happens in every type of situation, money, food, relationships, etc. Excess promotes waste and error. Our emotional wants, have the ability to high jack our thoughts and lead us to incorrect thinking.
After the discussion we had after the last entry, I definitely agree that correct logical thinking often leads to correct emotional well being, but because emotions are so wide ranging, they cannot be trusted as a choice making scheme that will bring happiness. Emotions must be bridled and constantly kept in check.
Ask any woman who “loves” a man who doesn’t love them back if they are “happy”? Surprisingly, many will say they are, even when they are not.
Road rage is another extreme example; perfectly normal, rational people become murderers because they cannot keep their emotions in check.
While these are extreme illustrations, I believe that on a daily basis we confuse ourselves with what will bring us happiness. Thankfully, we can control these thoughts and feelings if we recognize them.
To answer Tracy’s last questions I will say this:
Tracy- I like to think of emotion as what drives the action after the thought has gone into it. A football player can be very emotional and also mistake prone. If the football player can channel his emotions into the framework of his assignment or training, he becomes unstoppable. If he were to run around yelling and screaming without direction, his teammates would think he was crazy. The thought is the direction and aim, the emotion fuels the execution. This is exactly how it is for me with photography. When they are both there…wow…its synergistic and amazing! One alone isn’t enough. Ask anyone who sees my reaction after a good shoot or photo. It’s one of the best natural highs. So to answer your question, its not so much about turning off your emotions as it is keeping them in check, usually after you have thought it out, and then applying the emotion to it. When I say this, I am talking about good emotions.
Bad emotions are basically like bricks. You are just carrying extra weight, find a way to unload these emotions or remove yourself from situations where you feel them and just move on.
I think the discussion of how faith plays a role in our thoughts and emotions will be the next entry on this topic. Obviously, its deep and beyond my understanding, but I will throw out what I think about it and would love to hear what you guys think as well.
I beg to differ that perfectly "normal" people become murderers while under the duress of road rage. I understand your point, though. I think your further analysis of this subject of keeping emotions in check clarifies a lot. This is my one question that I still can’t get a good answer for. I believe that most of us have faith in our particular religions based on feelings that we have. In fact, faith is belief or hope in things not seen, but felt, true?? If you negate decision making based on an emotional impetus, how would you convince someone to believe in a particular religion?? I think most "spiritual" feelings are emotionally based. Enlighten me if you have some insight!!
Sorry, just re-read your last line, and have jumped the gun on your posts!! I agree with everything you said in this one except the road rage thing. I have seen a person I know get out of his car on several occasions to confront someone who had cut him off, and I let me just say that there was much more than just emotions playing there. A stable person doesn’t do this. So, there’s a the line between normal emotions and scary out of line things that result in people going to jail- ie. the effect of extreme emotional displays by people with mental illness, etc. I just know that I have spent the last decade of my life trying to differentiate between emotional and spiritual feelings, and it often leads you down roads that go contrary to everything you’ve based youru beliefs upon.
You are free to call things as you see them just as I do. I could be wrong, but the reason I say this is that In the US alone there are 300 cases per year of road rage which end in injury or fatalities. Many of these cases result in the prosecution and conviction of individuals without criminal records with murder. Here is a link: http://www.denverpost.com/ci_5682631
I think everyone has felt anger when they drive, yet not all act on these feelings. This is what I meant by my comment. Road rage is an interesting topic and I think what you are saying is those who commit road rage are not normal, while I am saying they are normal and then act too aggressively in response. I hate to even bring it up on this blog, but, yes….in many cases, normal people "snap" because of emotion.
ps- to confuse you all even more, I believe that nearly all of our choices are made on emotion. Sometimes it is controlled emotion, sometimes its spontaneous.
point taken on the road rage. I guess I’m speaking from my own perspective of things I’ve seen with an individual who had terrible road rage, and he was emotionally not stable in many aspects. Ok, so back to all choices made on an emotion- that is probably true… we aren’t robots after all!! But back to your original comments, about being smart and not making decisions based just on emotion. There are many things we believe in that are NOT rational, but we feel good about it and we base our lives on it. That’s where it gets confusing imho.