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Welcome to Michael's blog. Michael Andrew, (aka Michael The Maven) is a freelance producer, photography instructor, tech innovator, and when needed, disaster aid specialist. Disclaimer: Michael is a participant in Bhphoto & Amazon affiliate programs that provides an advertising commission if you purchase through links on this website.


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10.01.07         personal  

Blind Dating 104: Motivations


There are 4 reasons setteruppers feel compelled to set up single men and women on blind dates.

While nearly all setter uppers consciously feel they are “helping out” there are 4 real subconscious reasons. Its the difference between the wrapping paper and what is actually on the inside:

1. The Mote Remover – AKA “Dating Lifegaurds” or “I am going to fix you”. These types of setterupers are such that believe if you are single and over 21, you are socially handicapped. Not to worry, because if you were in a relationship, something would still be wrong with you and only they can “save” you through their superior relationship skills. This type of setterupper technically is not helping you out, they really believe that your life is doomed and you will soon die unless they intervene. Generally, these are people who have their own relationship problems and solve them by making more, I mean, by saving the “singles”.

2. The Beam Giver- AKA “Help I am drowning” or “You are going to fix me”. One of the two people being set up is actually a problem in the life of the setterupper. Also known as the hot potato theory; similar to a quarterback handing the ball off to a running back, only there are no offensive linemen blocking for him, and there are countless defenders waiting to tackle. It is the concept of “I have a problem and now I am going to give it to you”. These types are usually parents, siblings or roommates of the problem setteruppee. They are indifferent to who gets the hot potato as long as it is no longer in their hands. They are willing to pay for the date itself as well as“finders fees” to anyone who can find someone to date their problem, uh…I mean son/sister/roomy etc.

3. The Proxy Dater- This is the most flattering of intentions to be set up on a blind date, not to be mistaken with actually going on the date. Proxy daters are those setteruppers who are already in a committed relationship, however, when they find someone else they fancy, they date this person through someone else. Proxy daters are exclusively women, often mothers and view this as a form of entertainment. They will be intimately involved with every phase of the dating process, constantly probe both you and the other setteruppee for details. Gossip is guaranteed. Be careful men….if you reject the setteruppee they will view this as you rejecting them and hell hath no fury like a proxy dater dumped by proxy.

4. The Experimenter- This is the most dangerous type of setterupper. They view the setteruppees as a social experiment, either for their conflicting personality types, or for the desire to be entertained. Experimenters like to attend the blind date personally to control certain variables, ensure the date will last as long as possible and to record the catastrophic results first hand. They are masters of discomfort, vocally insisting both setteruppees accept each other immediately and insist on PDA between the setteruppees on the first date. Experimenters treasure such experiments primarily for the humor involved in retelling the story.

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